We Need Secrets

I read the following a few weeks ago and it has stuck with me ever since.

"I’ve written in other venues about the “thrill of the hunt.” And by that, I mean the hunt for that one back issue of a comic series you loved, that old album by the band you loved, or that out of print book by that author you loved. These “hunts” were a big part of my youth, and the very concept is gone now. Everything is easily found on the Internet with a few keystrokes.

But there’s more to the phenomenon than just the hunt for material goods. Just a few decades ago, it was hard to be an expert on something—even something frivolous. If you wanted to deep dive into something, it took time, determination, and sometimes a bit of creativity. When my friends and I could quote Ghostbusters verbatim back in the day, it was because we went to see the movie over and over again in the theater. If someone knew about a rare, alternate track by Elvis Costello, it was because they immersed themselves in Elvis Costello fandom over the course of years. When my friend could recite the names of all the First Age elves mentioned in The Silmarillion, it was because he pored over the book and made the list himself. 

Now, all of those things could be accomplished with a quick Internet search.

This isn’t “back in my day” complaining. I love the fact that all this information is readily available at our fingertips. We’re better off now, despite the loss of what I’m talking about. But I think there’s still something in human nature that wants to discover. To hunt. To learn some secret not easily found—or, perhaps more importantly—not found by someone else. For some of us, we don’t want to read about someone else’s discoveries; we want to make them on our own.”

- Monte Cook - MCG game design blog

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I could not agree more with Mr. Cook and what I also identify with in those thoughts above is the core of what makes creativity such a compelling pursuit for me. Everything I do, I realize, is about the slow discovery. The unfolding of time, abilities and the way we grow incrementally closer to what we create the more we put ourselves into it.  The secrets within.

For me, hand crafting in the internet age is an absolute salvation. I have been blessed by a lot of wonderful twists and turns along this road to making a creative life and the internet and technology are crucial in the avenue of selling, marketing, even offering inspiration. Yet one of the most refreshing discoveries was that folks, for the most part, still love a handmade item over something easily reproduced. 

I am befuddled by the number of people who set out to try something, creative or otherwise and, if it is not an instant success or at the very least, if it does not quickly show signs of being so, they move on. Now, I've done my share of "moving on" in my own life but we are talking about moving on after investing years in something before making that ultimate decision. Really taking them as far as I thought I could go, sometimes further. And all those things I left behind still play a role in my new discoveries at times today. The same way that a 16th century map informed the 17th century cartographer and on down the line. 

When I look at the sculpting and making-of-things that I have invested myself in over the last 8 years now, and I see those first pieces that sold, that people actually gave me money for, I am truly amazed.

I never questioned if I would get "here" one day. I knew that from experience and from the fact I grew up in an era when you HAD to put the time in. For anything. Nothing was available with such immediacy. And for that I am extremely grateful. 

It just takes time.

When I sit down each morning to work on my book, I know very well how far I still have to go. I'm new to that creative form of expression and I have to learn things on the fly, stop often to seek out a reference or sidestep the story to explore a character, setting, idea, grammar usage or ancient myth. It takes time, yes, but it has to be done.

In a day when folks are abandoning the well written blog left and right, the hard form of writing, for the ease of instant I-phone photo glam, for the lifestyle account and the Instagram fix, I feel grateful to have been brought up in another time. At the very least, one that bridges both worlds.  

I am so grateful for the fact that the one thing the internet will never change is that, to be good at something physical, something creative, be it sculpting, writing, RPG game design, painting, illustration, dance, cosplay, architecture, acting, landscape design, and on and on, you are going to have to be willing to sit down and put in the time. All the instruction, how-to tutorials and step by step instructions won't give you the skill without the hours of application. And they won't give you an original voice/style/expression either.

In the work of almost all of my blog friends here I have been given the gift of seeing YOU uncover those secrets in your own work over years. I've watched them grow and reveal themselves in time. There is so much beauty in that and it sustains me and inspires me as well. 

Those who are just starting or still dreaming of a creative life.  .  . you are going to have to take that deep dive, start at square one and do the work, try to refine that technique or reinvent it until you think you can't possibly do it again, then go ahead and do it again anyway. 

You'll pore over the hints, tips, instructions whether they came from a 100 yr old book or from a website. But trust me, it WILL be worth every moment you put in down the road.  By all means, embrace technology as a tool, just not as the means to the end. It will never be creative in and of itself. People made it so. People opened that door and refined it for you too. Now go further.

And if you, like me, want secretes to be revealed? 
Stick with the art. 
Stick with the practice.
It will make you so glad that you did one day.
I promise you.

And along the way

You will make those important discoveries

You will improve and know yourself better

And you're going to learn those secrets.

The most important of which will be the ones locked within yourself. 
The ones that nobody else can access for you. 

And those, no matter what the internet and our digital age provides for you as far as information at your fingertips, THOSE secrets will be the ones you will cherish the most.

XO

nicolas

New mini woodland Muridae Market mouse. Chettes is the first but more to come soon!

One continuos build/sculpt, layering colored clay, onyx eyes, a culmination of 8 yrs of secrets revealed and discovered.
Worth every moment spent. :)

Lost Seasons

Here it is the first eek of October and I have barely been able to find time to create an "seasonal" work for the shops.  Even pieces I already had designed, like the Mini Halloween Tombstones below which debuted last year, have taken a back seat this year.

OK, NEXT year I am going to ROCK these!

Just created this pair for a customer! Love the Ghoul Hands!

This one began the entire series last year. Back in 2002 I had made many of these, in full size, for a Halloween Yard display which many tiny kids were too scared to walk thru to get their candy! So when they DID brave the walk, they got handsomely rewarded for their efforts in candy! mwahahahahaaha

I am not sure how I feel about this. . . it is beginning to feel a bit like a lost season in some ways. . . Halloween and Christmas/Winter are my two favorite times of year to create specifically for but I continue to find myself bound by custom work and requests. . . as well as my own ever-expanding range of ideas. Oh it's a sweet dilemma to have . . . that's for sure! :)

Today is the first time in weeks I have the entire day to do as I wish. . . and I am going to focus on new items and not worry so much about the holidays.  I have four very specific things I wish to create that I am focused on.

One is a series of 6x6 Fantasy Wall Hangings/Shadow Boxes (ok I know I need to come up with something a little more easy on the tongue there)  I have an entire series in mind but am about 40% thru the first iteration: An Elf sleeping under a large tree, a Dutch windmill scene in the background and tulips, spell books and other miniature delights all around him. (Pictures soon I promise!)

Two: I am creating little 3" x 6" Fortune Tellers like the old arcade versions you'd plunk a quarter into to receive your fortune. This will feature the Upper body arms and hands of the fortune teller herself, tiny cards, crystal ball and more. . . all displayed in a bamboo shadow box display as well.

Three:  Reviving my series of Grumpus figurines. There are plant/terrarium dwelling creatures with huge feet and noses (they are in fact, mostly head hands and feet!) and very grumpy looking expressions. I am shrinking them in scale so that they better fit all houseplant environments..So these will be about 3" tall or half the size ofmy older ones.

Four: A new series of pearlescent fairy houses called "The Fairy Houses of Giddings Hill" with half stone facades, dark rooftops and lots of lovely accents. . . .

And last, after actually following though with my blog (for the most part) the month of September  I am going to take that exercise of writing a 10 minute blog each day ( I manages 23 posts in September I believe!) and apply it to an idea that I know, if I do not make time for, I will deeply regret and likely never get started on if I wait for the "perfect time" and that is to begin constructing the fantasy book/novella  I have been compiling ideas for for the last year. No working title yet but lots of bits and pieces. So, ten minutes a day writing/fleshing out ideas/drawings etc etc. I'll use this blog as a way to stay focused by posting snippets, maps and images and chapters on occasion. ALL feedback will be greatly appreciated. As with anything I have created, it begins with a selfish desire to simply make it happen and bring it into the world. I have no attachment to what happens beyond that. I'll self publish it I am sure, at first, Maybe even self bind a few dozen special editions of it when it is completed. . . .we'll see.

Thank you to all of you who read some of the September posts and those dear friends who commented here and there!

The rest of the year looks busy . . . if not with holiday delights then with new ideas and continued growth in my own form and paracosm of expresion. :)

Have a lovely Autumn (or Spring if you're "down under") weekend!

nicolas

New Work from Shadow of the Sphinx

Just time this evening for a few images of four pieces just finished for some of my delightful customers. Enjoy!!

Small 5" Statue of Seshat the Goddess of Writing, Arithmetic and Architecture

Serqet or Selket - 7.5" tall - Scorpion Goddess - Protective Deity - The form I chose borrows from the famous gold statue of Her that guarded Tut's burial sarcophagus/shrine.

The Sutekh on the right I posted yesterday but he goes with this second Seshat as a pair. Aren't they a formidable duo?

A Month of Gathering

Back in 2004, a few years before he died, my father and I spoke often about life. We were never close when I was a child as he and my mum divorced when I was four. This was, for all intents and purposes, a very good thing for her AND I.  He was very stodgy, quite mainstream in a narrow and limiting way and he had little room for self expression and the roads less traveled in life.

I cannot imagine who I would have turned out to be if he were a directive force in my developing years. . . but people change.

We reconnected when my grandmother, his mother, died when I was 19. Slowly, we built the strands of connection after he accepted my plea that, "I don't need you to be dad anymore.  . I need a friend."

And a very good friend he turned out to be.

So that day, as I recounted all that was going on in my life, how I was pursuing my love of music-making and music production for others. How I was thriving owning a coffeehouse and creating digital art and poetry. (this is all about 5 years before my creative life as you see it now even began)
He listened quietly and patiently and then, when I had finished, he offered the following.

"Son, I've never told you this but I wish I had lived (he was 61 at the time) my life more like you. I would do it differently now but back then I always was so concerned with climbing the ladder of success and making more money and having better this and better that. There are so many things I thought to do but did not have the courage or the inner strength to try. And I see you, living your life this way and your voice is filled with joy and I feel every new experience brings you closer to something bigger. Maybe even closer to a sense of "purpose"? "

"But I am going to give you one piece of advice" he continued. "From here, the choices in your life will get tougher because you are still seeking  and yet you have managed to eliminate all of the things people usually fill their lives with that are less than fulfilling. You love your job. You love where you live and you love the people around you. You have several creative outlets that take up every moment of your free time.  . . and I know you, my son. You are going to keep finding things that you love and now? Now the choices are going to be between two or more things you love and where will they fit in when the days will always only be 24hrs long? And you don't do anything half assed. . . so where is the time going to come from and when those new "right things" present themselves? Because one of them may be "it". So remember that you'll have to make room for them. And that it is ok to let go of something you love as much as something you don't.

Oh, how right he was.

So the last 6 months as I've "struggled" with the lack of time that being a full time, all the time, maker-of-things requires and found myself overloaded with custom orders and requests as all the while the new ideas pile up and up and I cannot tend to them, And then, beneathe it all, this "new thing". . . this sense of something greater being right there all along. . . oh yes, it reared it's head and asked to be heard.

I once again took stock.
Made lists and looked deep within for the answer to what stays and what goes. . .
 And here is what has changed from that kid who got that piece of advice 10 years ago.

The "new thing" is that I DO feel a sense of purpose in what I do now. It's the one thing I have done in my life (and I have done and tried more than my share) that feels really close to perfect and complete as far as being part of the thread I have known since childhood.

But these days I feel pulled to leave something behind. Something more than just bits and pieces and assorted lovelies. . . though those are as much a part of the "purpose" as what I have planned

My father was right,

I do not do anything half-assed. I don't know how.  The details are everything and no matter how much I love something I make, I find myself looking to make it better and just a bit more innovative next time around. Good enough is never good enough even if I am the only one who sees it.

In truth, when people ask me for advice on making it with an online shop or with creative self employment, I usually include this one little piece of advice. What ever you do today, you can do better tomorrow and you have to want that, without fail, first and foremost or you'll not get far in the creative world.

First, you have to make room for it. . . and it requires lots of room.
Then, YOU have to
Grow
Change
Innovate
Reinvent
and
REACH


It's time now for me to reach. . .

I am setting a larger goal with the worlds I create.

They have been these lovely bits and pieces with little stories (also a must in the creative world I think.  . tell a story!) that often are there before the pieces themselves.

But I want to bring them together and give something more through them.
A larger story that ties many of the smaller pieces together.
A world that is tangible and ever growing.

In my head, they always were this but, if I have one shortfall, it's that I often do not have the patience to write in such broad scope AND detail. I offer little detailed glimpses when an entire world is right there waiting to be brought to life. 

And that world is what I want to leave behind. . .hopefully to inspire others as I have ben inspired by those that came before.

So this is what I have been doing the last month. Losing myself in reading about ancient civilizations, myths and stories I have loved my whole life and making notes, creating names, filling in gaps in my own stories and letting that world emerge. . . one village, one character, one myth at a time and, as is my way, the details sometimes come out first.

These are a couple of Elvin "reliquaries" I created this week that are just 1.5 and 2.75 inches tall. . . . perhaps containing mythic dragon scales or bits of ancient magic cloth, or a troll's tooth. . .  or a thread of pure spun gold from time before time? Who can say?

What would YOU imagine to be found within an Elvin Reliquary?

More on their story in future posts. . .

Which is where the blog fits in with my future plans. 

So many bits and pieces to keep track of and I am not an organized person by any means. So I will be posting more often and shorter posts with just that.  . . bits and pieces of the larger story. . . threads that are all being woven into the larger world of my imagination. . . into the world of Bewilder and Pine. . . I hope you'll come along with me on this journey. It's going to be an adventure, I promise! :)

And my father, on that day I referred to earlier, added one more thing at the very end of the conversation that I took to heart then and still do to this day.

"No matter how busy you get. . . call your mother more. Because you'll regret it if you don't one day."

Thanks dad. . . you really were a true and beloved friend.


Thank you all for stopping by!
Soon again. . .
nicolas

Something New

It's funny how plans go awry all the time.

I've never been one to try to force anything in my creative business path. I'd rather let things grow organically and not force anything. As long as I am working, improving my craft and trying new ideas, I am quite content to not try and control where things go day to day.

When I began my Shadow of the Sphinx shop on Etsy, I was sure that within a year or two I would branch out and cover other ancient civilizations and make statues and amulets inspired by many civilizations the world over. Well, four years later, the short of the story is I just got so caught up in my own deepening and delving into my subject matter of the Ancient Egyptian pantheon and the art that honored it that I sort of lost track of that goal for awhile. I have beencontent to work on learning those sculpting skills to better the work and not so much onletting myself get carried away with all sorts of side-treks into history.

Recently though I have taken a few requests for pieces that fell outside of that pantheon and I am loving the experience. Mostly it's the fact that I get to learn/read about and explore other cultures and ancient traditions and bring some of those symbols and deities to life. 

This week I finished this guy. called Ikenga  (in his warrior form)

(from wikipedia)
Ikenga (Igbo literal meaning "place of strength") is a horned Alusi (deity) found among the Igbo people in southeastern Nigeria . It is one of the most popular symbols of the Igbo people, and the most common cultural artifact. Ikenga is mostly maintained, kept or owned by men and occasionally by women of high reputation and integrity in the society. It comprises someone's Chi (personal god), his Ndichie (ancestors), aka Ikenga (right hand), ike (power) as well as spiritual activation through prayer and sacrifice.

And here is the finished piece:

  The finish is a micaceous Iron Oxide over black acrylic which adds a textural feel and a light catching surface that I love.

On the heels of this piece are requests for a statue of Freya, one of Odin, a Loki, a set of Terracotta warriors, a statue of Angrbodaan, an Uzume and a totally fictional piece for a novel/book cover that will be a cross between a Jizo and an Aztec inspired votive. . . so I suppose I am being told the time to expand and explore is now? lol

Of course. my main focus remains, in this shop, the Egypian pantheon and it's vast variety of deity depictions. . . . but I love these little side steps into any aspect of ancient history and the chance to do something new.  :)

And while it is still secondary to my desire to create fairies, elves, tin houses and reflections of that magical world within, this work remains dear to my heart and, in it's own way, a vital part of that childhood paracosm I sink into every day. 

Have a beautiful Mayday all!

nicolas

Fairy Tales

It occurred to me very recently that perhaps the main reason I drift in and out of blogging is because I feel that so much of what I want to say and convey about the creative path I am on and the origins of it in my life are not spoken but, rather, find a way into my work each and every day. Often, at then end of the day with a number of visual images, gargoyles, fairy houses and Egyptian Gods and Goddesses all coexisting on my studio table, I realize my entire day has been filled with unspoken dialogues and enough words to fill a three volume set. :)

It also seems to make sense to me that I can choose the pieces to display here in blog form, not for publicity sake but for an opportunity to reveal what is behind them. Bit by bit to find the core ofmy place of origin and to, in a sense, add to the map of my life.

The other day I completed this piece as the first of a set that will be featured next year in Bewilder and Pine,

Miniature N Scale  - Hansel and Gretel Discover the Witches Cottage

This piece speaks to many of my origins. The worlds I would create within my childhood. Often invested in them alone and keeping them close to my heart as I just felt that any outside input or exposure would change them. Alter them and, in fact, weaken their power and place within my own mythology.

Second, as a pre-teen, my love for model railroading and building entire scenes of a new layout every year remain one of the most treasured ways that I spent time in that older-youth era. Of course, this was a pursuit embraced by my family as well so I could work on it in the open but, I am positive, no one ever really saw INTO that world I created each year. Every figure and every part of the overall scene had a backstory. A dialogue and a plot that often changed over the two months it was up and running. I'd add to it and rearrange it each year with a fresh view of it. In reality, the train was the least of my concerns. It was about taking these little pieces, people and structures and making something new from them that fit wit my own paracosm.

And fairy tales. . . I simply adore them. The dark, the light, the rambling and the brief. They remind me, simply put, of the worlds I create as well as the possibility of anything becoming our reality in this world.

Once, when I first moved to the Oregon Coast, I considered renting a piece of property/that had been started as a retreat space with a beautiful A-Frame house. The price was truly way out of my price range but I debated and schemed how I could manage it all  because the original owner had built, in the middle of the woods, a large, free standing mushroom room. Seriously. it stood 8 to 9 feet tall at the peak of it's red spotted mushroom cap roof and was about 7 feet in diameter on the inside with stained glass windows, electrical outlets and a hardwood floor.  I mean, it felt like a portal had opened and this mushroom had somehow slipped to our side from a fairy tale side of existence. What magic!

So, my point is that I truly believe that every person must create from what they know inherently. Or it comes off seeming false somehow. That doesn't mean it should or will be easy as often the most difficult roads are the ones that lead us back to ourselves.

And if we are lucky we find that trail of crumbs that the little Hansels and Gretels in us left behind. . .
we find or way thru the dark woods and past the scary creatures of this world. We survive to create new and personal tales. . . .and we all do this no matter what the path we take.

So, you'll likely see me around more often and I hope you won't mind the display of my work in the posts. It is how I get to what is inside and to what I truly want to say. . . . and quite often, it is all I have to say. :)

Thank you, as always, for reading. :)

nicolas

Three Hearts in the Happy Ending Machine - #1

I'd like to also begin sharing my work from my creative studio here. For those who do not know, I have three very distinct shops on Etsy.  So, once a week, I will feature one selection from each shop here to give you all a feel for what I do and how all those wonderful childhood creative pursuits have now come back full circle and are allowing me to make a living from my love of making things. :)

Theory of Flight - Blue Herons Limited Edition Print from My Antarctica

 Visual art has been there within me since I was able to finger paint. lol but in truth I just took up the art of photography about 6 years ago. The digital realm allows for me to create things I only see in my head that would be either impossible or impractical to try and stage as a photograph. In the case of Theories of Flight, the backgrounds are Encaustic swirls of wax and color and the image is a photo etching over top.

Sekhmet and Bast from my new Mini Copper Patina Votive Statues from Shadow of the Sphinx

 From the time I first saw images of the tomb of Tutankhamen I was hooked on ancient Egyptian religion and art. The more I read about it the more I was drawn to the humbler everyday practice of votive worship and the more my own creations reflected that. Simple statues for everyday home altars and offerings.

My newest Burano Italy HO Scale Houses - SOLD - From Bewilder and Pine

I am forever under the spell of Venice Italy. Who wouldn't be? The houses of Burano island are just over the top. The colors and the distinctive walkways are so mesmerizing to me. These seem to go out of my shop as fast as I can create them which, I assume, is because so many others are also under the Venetian spell!!


I hope you enjoy my work and I hope you will visit the shops to see more~

Until the next,

nicolas