Happy New Year to you all! I hope the first days of the year have been bright and inspired in each of your worlds. :)
Over the years I've had quite a few people ask about the words I choose each New Year as my focus words for the coming 365 days. Thinking of it again of late, I have been more focused on exactly how that process works and the answers were a bit surprising to me, so I thought I would share them here with you as well as the words that I've chosen for 2018.
I tend to not spend too much time choosing the words each year. At least, not right at the end. I start thinking of them early in December and by the last days of the Year, I pretty much have the new words settled on.
What I discovered this last week or so as I thought about 2017's words was that the words really reveal themselves to me and I learn the most about them in relation to myself at the END of the year!
All year I DO see them above my calendar or on my desktop and I take time with them all at some point, maybe picking one for a day to really focus on or apply. But it is at the end of the year, when I am looking back, that I seem to find how those words worked for me or what I learned over that year as it pertains to them.
Last year, one of the words I chose was "Vagary". Strange word, right? It is. . . and I chose it for it's more archaic definition which I only discovered as it was Merriam Webster's word of the day sometime before and it just sort of stuck with me in the back of my mind.
"In the 16th century, if you "made a vagary" you took a wandering journey, or you figuratively wandered from a correct path by committing some minor offense. If you spoke or wrote vagaries, you wandered from a main subject. These senses hadn't strayed far from their origin, as vagary is probably based on Latin vagari, meaning "to wander." Indeed, in the 16th and 17th centuries there was even an English verb vagary that meant "to wander." Nowadays, the noun vagary is mostly used in its plural form, and vagaries have more to do with unpredictability than with wandering."
I chose the word hoping that it's own wandering in the sense of it's definition over the years might help remind me to wander in my creative journey. To stray from the well worn path. To pay attention to, or think back on, my own wandering journeys in life. Maybe even to be a little more unpredictable creatively. So how it affected me on any given day I cannot recall BUT I know that as I spent time over this last week of the year looking back, I DID practice and invoke vagary and I can see how the wandering I did in my creative work paid off.
My life, I came to see, has been one great adventure in vagary. Changing careers four times, each by choice even when things were just fine in the previous ones. Striking out on the cusp of 40 years old to begin an art practice/Etsy shop by taking up a new medium of polymer clay. Moving across the country on a gut feeling just before I turned 24. Living in a big city til then, then a small town, then onto another big city and now a small town again.
Yes, I've wandered. Strayed from the path. Practiced vagary before I even knew the word had that older meaning.
So in realizing that these words seem to etch themselves deepest at the end of the year, I decided to choose five words for 2018 and went with simpler, less archaic choices. lol
Because these are words I might easily overlook in that search for a little pizazz. (Ooooooh wait. . . pizazz. . . hello word for 2019!)
For 2018, I chose these five words:
Challenge - challenge myself to try new creative ideas, follow inspirations, push forward on my bigger long term goals, stretch my comfort zone into the difficult and uncertain creatively and challenge myself to venture into realms not yet explored in myth, fantasy and sci-fi reading.
Value - Value my work and my time. I have often undercharged for just about everything I've done in life at some point or another. I forget, when say we are speaking of custom orders, to factor in the time spent communicating, planning, looking for materials I need and trying and retrying techniques etc. Maybe it's meant to show me how to value my time by accepting fewer commissions so I can do even more of the work my heart wants to do. I've also recently begun donating to funding art projects on kickstarter. I'm learning to discern value of what I give to there as well since I cannot donate to everyone I would like to.
Whimsy - Sofie laughed at this one because, really, do I need a reminder of this? lol But yes, I do, and in this case I am thinking most of my writing. Finding the balance between a good, emotive and large scale story and the magic of a fantasy world. A small example: It's all well and good that I've included the plausible use of messenger birds for long a distance/expedient message delivery system but where's the whimsy? Ahhhh, so then I decide that these are "honey guides", birds who find their way home or to another location based on a particular scent/strain of honey that they are conditioned to seek out and identify. And they have small quivers on their backs to carry the messages. There are real "honey guide" birds in our world though they are not messengers. . . all I did was stretch the truth a bit there to make them more homing pigeon-like if one could train them to discern the various scents of the honey over distances. :) So yes, finding whimsy around every corner in the year to come.
Organization - OK, yes. . . Boring! But boy could I use a bit more of this. Work space, packing room, notes and ideas, recipes, you name it. I tend to let things get a bit too in disarray before I tackle them and that's never fun.
Routine - As in a more monastic sense of the word. Monasteries have always fascinated me no matter the type or the belief. I've spent time in a Zen monastery here in the NW though I am also drawn to the Benedictine rule and Franciscan sects and the schedules they keep. Now if the pslams and vespers were say, writing and creating time instead, I'd be in a robe faster than you could blink an eye!! The simplicity of the life and the repetition of it is what draws me. I need it to be my most productive. Work periods, meal periods, end of day etc. Not so regimented that there is no room for spontaneity but certainly most days, most weeks, and most hours are best filled with that scheduled intent for me.
So what will those all bring? Well I hope to share anything along the way if it pops up but it will likely be the end of 2018 before I can look back and assess all the little things that came to pass under each heading. Once, in the Zen monastery, I was sent out into the world after a weekend retreat with a task. To pick a location and watch the entry door of said place for a few hours. Just to observe how people reacted and related to that door. It seemed pretty Zen and I expected to not "get it" because, you know. . . Zen.
None of the openings of the door were memorable in and of their own BUT, at the end of the day, the cumulative effect was very striking. I saw such a variety of ways people approached the door, how close they got before grabbing the door knob, if they were regulars I could tell because the door had a "hitch" to it, the doorknob was rickety and lower down on the frame than normal. Also, the door opened in and not out as most non-regulars seemed to expect it to. I saw how some people held the door for others while some were so in their own heads they didn't notice the person right behind them. I noticed people approach confidently or with a strong step and others cautiously and tentative as if the door might bite. . . And on and on. All of that from observing a door over a period of time.
So that's how I find the words work best. Over the long haul. I don't expect an enlightening occurrence any one time I choose to focus on a word. But 12 months from now? We'll see. ;)
Next month I will be back to my usual First Friday post showing new work.
Thank you for coming by, as always,
nicolas
Showing posts with label projects. Show all posts
Showing posts with label projects. Show all posts
Friday, January 5, 2018
Sunday, July 23, 2017
Inspiration - Stepping into Another World
Before I start rambling I want to say/share three things up front.
One, I am glad there are ALL kinds of people in this world. I would not want everyone to be, think or see things as I do. I recently heard of a young man who walks across the country. That's what he "does". Sometimes he works odd jobs for cash and sometimes he is graced with the kindness of strangers who help when he is in need, And you know what? I think he is as important to our world as the doctor or the sanitation worker or the teacher because, like all of us, his story can inspire. It can ignite an imagination. It can offer hope for those who feel like they themselves are an outsider or a little lost.
Two, I do NOT believe I have the answers for most young or aspiring artists. But I DO believe the way Sofie and I got "here" can be as inspiring and offer a glimpse into another way to live life. Choices that can be made today. Especially in a world that seems hell-bent on sinking everyone into debt, identity crisis and existential despair before they are 25. It's still about choice. And, since we are here to say "Look, we are doing it!", then I think it's worth hammering that point home sometimes.
Three - My Zen teacher used to say that our ambitions and pursuits in life are akin to cupping your hands together and then having someone pour cups of sand into them, each cup representing a different undertaking or passion. One cup at a time, for each new pursuit, passion or focus you take on. At some point, the only way to take on another half cup of sand, a new pursuit or passion, is to let go of some of the sand you already hold or the newly added sand will fall off the sides. Or you can fill your hands by only adding a part of, say, 6 or 7 different cups instead of at the whole of 2 or 3 of them. In addition, some of the sand in your hands also will likely leak out as you try to open your hands wider to hold/make room for the new sand. . . now you don't have a full grasp on any of those passions. . . that simple visual, and recognizing it was perfectly indicative of my own way of trying to do or take on too much, always made me smile.
Anyway, on with it. . .
One of the things I love about writing little stories, and now a novel about a fantasy world, is that it requires me to get out of my own world. Literally to step, thru the senses and experiences of the characters, into a place foreign and unknown.
But in many cases the inspiration for what I create DOES come from this world we live in, though it may be, as in my case, from another time.
This week I was writing a scene where my character needs to travel quite a distance in one chapter to make some deliveries. I was halfway thru when I realized that I had no idea exactly how far some of the places she needed to go were spaced from each other. They were there on the map, of course, but the terrain, the roads etc had only been lines on that map til then. She had a full basket to carry or barrow to push. Though the light is longest this time year in the story, it seemed a long way to travel . . . at least by our modern ideals.
So I turned, as I always do, to a very detailed book of life in and around early Victorian London. And what I find when I do this sort of research is exactly how far we have come, and how far we have fallen back, in terms of what we are capable of and/or willing to do in our own daily lives.
Reading about Victorian London market vendors who did not live in the city proper, but who came in from the surrounding countryside, and how they would rise in the middle of the night and start out for the city by 2 or 3AM. They would walk up to 6 or 7 miles (10 or 11KM) pushing a barrow or carrying their goods with them to reach the market. Then they would turn around and walk back home after the market was done or when they had sold out of their goods, often purchasing what they themselves required to haul back with them.
This was NORMAL for so many people.
For folk who needed to do this daily, the idea of leisure time was so rare an occurrence. Other than Sunday after church, they had perhaps no more than a half hour each day before falling into bed exhausted. Then waking four or five hours later to go and do it all over again.
To find that place to write from, when we live now in a world where some people I've known won't get up and DRIVE five minutes to the store at a still reasonable hour because it's "too far" or they're "too tired" is rather hard to comprehend. Have I ever walked/hiked that far when it was not just for sheer leisure or hiking for personal enjoyment? No, I do not think I have. Not once, let alone day after day, carrying a heavy bundle or pushing a barrow, just to survive.
And I do not want to compare myself to those hard working people of the Victorian era but when I read these things I realize that, even today, this is why I seclude myself in the world of my choosing. Blocking out much of the outside world.
We live in a world that embraces bigger cars and trucks, more conveniences, more ease and comfort at the expense of, literally, our own well-being, more all-in-one stores, faster and further reaching ability to travel and more choices and options on everything and anything you can think of.
Now I am not saying I wish to live in Victorian London. Well, maybe in the world of Larkrise to Candleford. . . the books I've read certainly cover, in all the repulsive detail, the smoky darkness, the noise, the dirt, the smells and the discomforts just as well. But I DO feel that the idea of walking a few miles, of rising before the sun to accomplish or pursue goals, should NOT be a shock or a tribulation given our modern convenience filled world! It's certainly not a true hardship. And it should not come with the cry of others saying "oh, how horrible". Those Victorian market sellers are people who did what they had to in order to survive. To build a life. To feed themselves and their families. It was routine. It was just life.
In building the life I have now, I had to do a similar sort of "research". With the exception of a few Zen monastics I knew there were really so few examples in the city of people who chose to live with less. It seemed so out of the box to set out finding a place to live that was inexpensive, yet felt safe. A small, functioning town where we could get by without a car at all. Without highways and off ramps. Choosing to go with no iPhones or telephone data charges, no cable tv or satellite/dish. No eating out, which meant cooking all our meals at home from scratch. Using coupons all the time at the stores. Stocking up when something was really cheap. Now, the "research" in this case was close at hand. . . these were all things my mother and grandparents imparted to me, by their own life examples, as I was growing up. They lived thru and were part of the Great Depression and war-era generations that got by and sacrificed to survive. My own mother, a single mother working a service industry job, doing whatever she had to so we could be comfortable and safe. These were the very best examples I could have had, that much I know.
We never had much. . . but I never once felt, or look back now and see, a lacking of anything important in that life we lived.
Somehow over the years those sacrifices and willing choices became the signs of an "impoverished life". Again, I say, really? I know people who literally cannot cook a meal at home. Who can't navigate a grocery store without calling home on the i-Phone to ask where things are located. . . let alone those who would not be alright for one day without their cell phone on them at all times.
On my last two trips on a city bus before we moved I had two very different experiences that highlight the extremes. In one, on a bus filled with middle school age kids heading home from school. In the two dozen or so of them who likely take this crowded ride home every day, most were just being kids, laughing, yelling, sharing things from their Facebook and twitter feeds on their phones. In the midst of it all sat one girl, headphones plugged into an iPod, sketch pad out drawing away, oblivious to the din around her and, I like to think, daydreaming in a world of her own making. She didn't interact with the other kids at all though she clearly knew some of them. At every stop, as one or more of them rose to leave, they had a dozen kids that they had to say goodbye to as they made their way thru the crowd. When this girl reached her stop, three others got off there too. Yet she kept her headphones on and, with just a wave to another girl sitting nearby, she walked alone towards her home. I got a little misty eyed recognizing something inside her that was also in me at that age and I thought, "there's a girl who is always going to be just fine."
In the second experience, two high schoolers, boy and girl, sat on a far less crowded bus and the girl was sharing with him some of the trouble she was having at school. The boy, his face buried in the screen of his phone, was distracted, obviously. At one point she said something to him about it and he apologized, saying he had to keep an eye on his phone so that he would know where his stop was. She seemed dumbfounded, and said, "But you take the bus home every day!" and he replied, "I know, but I need my phone to tell me which stop is mine." I looked out the windows at the passing street signs, landmarks, restaurants etc etc and wondered how has it come to that? At 12 or 13 I used to navigate the streets of a fairly large city, take streetcars, make transfers and figure out how to traverse the maze-like streets and alleys if I had to get somewhere walking. I worry for kids like that because that young man has created a world too. One that it seems may not work to his best interests going forward. One that, in many ways, may limit his choices and shrink his world in not-so-advantageous ways.
For Sofie (who also grew up in a frugal minded family) and I, the choice was simple. Still is. We would not have been able to get to this point, making a full time living as makers-of-things, working from our home studio every single day, without having made those sacrifices at the start and without having had the experiences of our own childhoods when we had to rely on ourselves far more than most kids today ever will. We could not have done it without the examples of self sufficiency in our own families that showed us the way.
That's just a fact.
So, was it/is it worth it? No question. Do we feel like we sacrificed anything vital? No, not at all.
Today we are more self-sufficient that ever, I believe. We have zero debt, we have IRA's and a good little savings nest egg. None of which was a reality when we started this quest together and most of it is possible because of how we chose to live our life and how hard we work to maintain it. Yet we actually make LESS than we ever did working "career jobs" in the city when we couldn't seem to stay ahead.
By the way, we DO have a car now too. One that a little old lady drove once a week or so to the grocery store. Literally! We named her, in honor of Barbara, the woman who owned it for it's first 24 years, hence the name "Babs". So when we got Babs, that 24 yr old car had all of 16.000 miles on it. The woman's son, who was a friend of mine, just wanted the blue book value. . . which was $300. Babs runs like a dream and we continue to treat it as the previous owner did, driving it mostly for necessity too. We have had to put gas in it just twice since February. :) Our mechanic tell us if we take care of it as we are, she'll outlast most cars a quarter her age.
What did we give up then? Well, it's a short list. Being close to family. City conveniences. Looking outside of ourselves for entertainment. But even giving up those few things brought more "perks. . . less obligation, less opportunity for frivolous spending, less anxiety and, as far as "entertainment" goes, I personally have read more books in the last five years than in the previous 20. As a child, reading and discovering new books and new worlds was my salvation. . . so that has been like finding an old friend again.
I've had people tell me outright, "Oh, I could never live like that." and "You sacrifice so much!"
So much? To enable me to do the thing I've wanted to do all of my life instead of wishing and just shrugging my shoulders at the seemingly impossible thought because I won't entertain the idea of "world-building" a life that this can support? Those are the folks that I want to remind of what daily life was like for most people just 150 years ago. Heck just 40 years ago. Remind them of the days when, say, TV was free and you had to get up off the couch to change the channel . . . and likely get up again in 5 minutes to mess with the rabbit ear antennae to get the station to come in halfway clear.
Seriously, it was not that long ago that even those simple, everyday things were very, very different.
In writing stories about a world like the Bewildering Pine, it feels like such a comfort to dive in, once again, to creating another way of life. To explore world-building thru these tales of many different elven folk and the secrets their little world hides. It's not a moralistic tale at all or, at least, not in it's planning. The whole of the original plan really was to take two or three dozen of "those would be great characters in a book" people I have known or met in my life and set them at odds as elven folk within a world that is not quite what it seems. Each with their own part to play be it part of the larger quest or just figuring out how to live their own small lives and be true.
The book is also a nod to my own family roots. To that ancestry and their new beginnings. To the changes that passing time brought in their world and even to the lost language and customs of the "old country" they left behind.
Mostly though, it's just another way of continuing what I have been doing my whole life. Creating a secluded, safe world where I can disappear and let my own imagination be the only guide thru.
On the written page or in real life (and real life is what I am talking about here!) it's all really just a matter of world-building and, in world-building, one thing remains the constant. . .
ANYTHING is possible. You just have to create it!!
And as for that Zen lesson I mentioned, it took me awhile to get it. . . in response I used to raise my hands up in front of my teacher and say. . ."Good thing I have large hands!" :)
xo
nicolas
One, I am glad there are ALL kinds of people in this world. I would not want everyone to be, think or see things as I do. I recently heard of a young man who walks across the country. That's what he "does". Sometimes he works odd jobs for cash and sometimes he is graced with the kindness of strangers who help when he is in need, And you know what? I think he is as important to our world as the doctor or the sanitation worker or the teacher because, like all of us, his story can inspire. It can ignite an imagination. It can offer hope for those who feel like they themselves are an outsider or a little lost.
Two, I do NOT believe I have the answers for most young or aspiring artists. But I DO believe the way Sofie and I got "here" can be as inspiring and offer a glimpse into another way to live life. Choices that can be made today. Especially in a world that seems hell-bent on sinking everyone into debt, identity crisis and existential despair before they are 25. It's still about choice. And, since we are here to say "Look, we are doing it!", then I think it's worth hammering that point home sometimes.
Three - My Zen teacher used to say that our ambitions and pursuits in life are akin to cupping your hands together and then having someone pour cups of sand into them, each cup representing a different undertaking or passion. One cup at a time, for each new pursuit, passion or focus you take on. At some point, the only way to take on another half cup of sand, a new pursuit or passion, is to let go of some of the sand you already hold or the newly added sand will fall off the sides. Or you can fill your hands by only adding a part of, say, 6 or 7 different cups instead of at the whole of 2 or 3 of them. In addition, some of the sand in your hands also will likely leak out as you try to open your hands wider to hold/make room for the new sand. . . now you don't have a full grasp on any of those passions. . . that simple visual, and recognizing it was perfectly indicative of my own way of trying to do or take on too much, always made me smile.
Anyway, on with it. . .
One of the things I love about writing little stories, and now a novel about a fantasy world, is that it requires me to get out of my own world. Literally to step, thru the senses and experiences of the characters, into a place foreign and unknown.
But in many cases the inspiration for what I create DOES come from this world we live in, though it may be, as in my case, from another time.
This week I was writing a scene where my character needs to travel quite a distance in one chapter to make some deliveries. I was halfway thru when I realized that I had no idea exactly how far some of the places she needed to go were spaced from each other. They were there on the map, of course, but the terrain, the roads etc had only been lines on that map til then. She had a full basket to carry or barrow to push. Though the light is longest this time year in the story, it seemed a long way to travel . . . at least by our modern ideals.
So I turned, as I always do, to a very detailed book of life in and around early Victorian London. And what I find when I do this sort of research is exactly how far we have come, and how far we have fallen back, in terms of what we are capable of and/or willing to do in our own daily lives.
Reading about Victorian London market vendors who did not live in the city proper, but who came in from the surrounding countryside, and how they would rise in the middle of the night and start out for the city by 2 or 3AM. They would walk up to 6 or 7 miles (10 or 11KM) pushing a barrow or carrying their goods with them to reach the market. Then they would turn around and walk back home after the market was done or when they had sold out of their goods, often purchasing what they themselves required to haul back with them.
This was NORMAL for so many people.
For folk who needed to do this daily, the idea of leisure time was so rare an occurrence. Other than Sunday after church, they had perhaps no more than a half hour each day before falling into bed exhausted. Then waking four or five hours later to go and do it all over again.
To find that place to write from, when we live now in a world where some people I've known won't get up and DRIVE five minutes to the store at a still reasonable hour because it's "too far" or they're "too tired" is rather hard to comprehend. Have I ever walked/hiked that far when it was not just for sheer leisure or hiking for personal enjoyment? No, I do not think I have. Not once, let alone day after day, carrying a heavy bundle or pushing a barrow, just to survive.
And I do not want to compare myself to those hard working people of the Victorian era but when I read these things I realize that, even today, this is why I seclude myself in the world of my choosing. Blocking out much of the outside world.
We live in a world that embraces bigger cars and trucks, more conveniences, more ease and comfort at the expense of, literally, our own well-being, more all-in-one stores, faster and further reaching ability to travel and more choices and options on everything and anything you can think of.
Now I am not saying I wish to live in Victorian London. Well, maybe in the world of Larkrise to Candleford. . . the books I've read certainly cover, in all the repulsive detail, the smoky darkness, the noise, the dirt, the smells and the discomforts just as well. But I DO feel that the idea of walking a few miles, of rising before the sun to accomplish or pursue goals, should NOT be a shock or a tribulation given our modern convenience filled world! It's certainly not a true hardship. And it should not come with the cry of others saying "oh, how horrible". Those Victorian market sellers are people who did what they had to in order to survive. To build a life. To feed themselves and their families. It was routine. It was just life.
In building the life I have now, I had to do a similar sort of "research". With the exception of a few Zen monastics I knew there were really so few examples in the city of people who chose to live with less. It seemed so out of the box to set out finding a place to live that was inexpensive, yet felt safe. A small, functioning town where we could get by without a car at all. Without highways and off ramps. Choosing to go with no iPhones or telephone data charges, no cable tv or satellite/dish. No eating out, which meant cooking all our meals at home from scratch. Using coupons all the time at the stores. Stocking up when something was really cheap. Now, the "research" in this case was close at hand. . . these were all things my mother and grandparents imparted to me, by their own life examples, as I was growing up. They lived thru and were part of the Great Depression and war-era generations that got by and sacrificed to survive. My own mother, a single mother working a service industry job, doing whatever she had to so we could be comfortable and safe. These were the very best examples I could have had, that much I know.
We never had much. . . but I never once felt, or look back now and see, a lacking of anything important in that life we lived.
Somehow over the years those sacrifices and willing choices became the signs of an "impoverished life". Again, I say, really? I know people who literally cannot cook a meal at home. Who can't navigate a grocery store without calling home on the i-Phone to ask where things are located. . . let alone those who would not be alright for one day without their cell phone on them at all times.
On my last two trips on a city bus before we moved I had two very different experiences that highlight the extremes. In one, on a bus filled with middle school age kids heading home from school. In the two dozen or so of them who likely take this crowded ride home every day, most were just being kids, laughing, yelling, sharing things from their Facebook and twitter feeds on their phones. In the midst of it all sat one girl, headphones plugged into an iPod, sketch pad out drawing away, oblivious to the din around her and, I like to think, daydreaming in a world of her own making. She didn't interact with the other kids at all though she clearly knew some of them. At every stop, as one or more of them rose to leave, they had a dozen kids that they had to say goodbye to as they made their way thru the crowd. When this girl reached her stop, three others got off there too. Yet she kept her headphones on and, with just a wave to another girl sitting nearby, she walked alone towards her home. I got a little misty eyed recognizing something inside her that was also in me at that age and I thought, "there's a girl who is always going to be just fine."
In the second experience, two high schoolers, boy and girl, sat on a far less crowded bus and the girl was sharing with him some of the trouble she was having at school. The boy, his face buried in the screen of his phone, was distracted, obviously. At one point she said something to him about it and he apologized, saying he had to keep an eye on his phone so that he would know where his stop was. She seemed dumbfounded, and said, "But you take the bus home every day!" and he replied, "I know, but I need my phone to tell me which stop is mine." I looked out the windows at the passing street signs, landmarks, restaurants etc etc and wondered how has it come to that? At 12 or 13 I used to navigate the streets of a fairly large city, take streetcars, make transfers and figure out how to traverse the maze-like streets and alleys if I had to get somewhere walking. I worry for kids like that because that young man has created a world too. One that it seems may not work to his best interests going forward. One that, in many ways, may limit his choices and shrink his world in not-so-advantageous ways.
For Sofie (who also grew up in a frugal minded family) and I, the choice was simple. Still is. We would not have been able to get to this point, making a full time living as makers-of-things, working from our home studio every single day, without having made those sacrifices at the start and without having had the experiences of our own childhoods when we had to rely on ourselves far more than most kids today ever will. We could not have done it without the examples of self sufficiency in our own families that showed us the way.
That's just a fact.
So, was it/is it worth it? No question. Do we feel like we sacrificed anything vital? No, not at all.
Today we are more self-sufficient that ever, I believe. We have zero debt, we have IRA's and a good little savings nest egg. None of which was a reality when we started this quest together and most of it is possible because of how we chose to live our life and how hard we work to maintain it. Yet we actually make LESS than we ever did working "career jobs" in the city when we couldn't seem to stay ahead.
By the way, we DO have a car now too. One that a little old lady drove once a week or so to the grocery store. Literally! We named her, in honor of Barbara, the woman who owned it for it's first 24 years, hence the name "Babs". So when we got Babs, that 24 yr old car had all of 16.000 miles on it. The woman's son, who was a friend of mine, just wanted the blue book value. . . which was $300. Babs runs like a dream and we continue to treat it as the previous owner did, driving it mostly for necessity too. We have had to put gas in it just twice since February. :) Our mechanic tell us if we take care of it as we are, she'll outlast most cars a quarter her age.
What did we give up then? Well, it's a short list. Being close to family. City conveniences. Looking outside of ourselves for entertainment. But even giving up those few things brought more "perks. . . less obligation, less opportunity for frivolous spending, less anxiety and, as far as "entertainment" goes, I personally have read more books in the last five years than in the previous 20. As a child, reading and discovering new books and new worlds was my salvation. . . so that has been like finding an old friend again.
I've had people tell me outright, "Oh, I could never live like that." and "You sacrifice so much!"
So much? To enable me to do the thing I've wanted to do all of my life instead of wishing and just shrugging my shoulders at the seemingly impossible thought because I won't entertain the idea of "world-building" a life that this can support? Those are the folks that I want to remind of what daily life was like for most people just 150 years ago. Heck just 40 years ago. Remind them of the days when, say, TV was free and you had to get up off the couch to change the channel . . . and likely get up again in 5 minutes to mess with the rabbit ear antennae to get the station to come in halfway clear.
Seriously, it was not that long ago that even those simple, everyday things were very, very different.
In writing stories about a world like the Bewildering Pine, it feels like such a comfort to dive in, once again, to creating another way of life. To explore world-building thru these tales of many different elven folk and the secrets their little world hides. It's not a moralistic tale at all or, at least, not in it's planning. The whole of the original plan really was to take two or three dozen of "those would be great characters in a book" people I have known or met in my life and set them at odds as elven folk within a world that is not quite what it seems. Each with their own part to play be it part of the larger quest or just figuring out how to live their own small lives and be true.
The book is also a nod to my own family roots. To that ancestry and their new beginnings. To the changes that passing time brought in their world and even to the lost language and customs of the "old country" they left behind.
Mostly though, it's just another way of continuing what I have been doing my whole life. Creating a secluded, safe world where I can disappear and let my own imagination be the only guide thru.
On the written page or in real life (and real life is what I am talking about here!) it's all really just a matter of world-building and, in world-building, one thing remains the constant. . .
ANYTHING is possible. You just have to create it!!
And as for that Zen lesson I mentioned, it took me awhile to get it. . . in response I used to raise my hands up in front of my teacher and say. . ."Good thing I have large hands!" :)
xo
nicolas
Saturday, October 4, 2014
Lost Seasons
Here it is the first eek of October and I have barely been able to find time to create an "seasonal" work for the shops. Even pieces I already had designed, like the Mini Halloween Tombstones below which debuted last year, have taken a back seat this year.
I am not sure how I feel about this. . . it is beginning to feel a bit like a lost season in some ways. . . Halloween and Christmas/Winter are my two favorite times of year to create specifically for but I continue to find myself bound by custom work and requests. . . as well as my own ever-expanding range of ideas. Oh it's a sweet dilemma to have . . . that's for sure! :)
Today is the first time in weeks I have the entire day to do as I wish. . . and I am going to focus on new items and not worry so much about the holidays. I have four very specific things I wish to create that I am focused on.
One is a series of 6x6 Fantasy Wall Hangings/Shadow Boxes (ok I know I need to come up with something a little more easy on the tongue there) I have an entire series in mind but am about 40% thru the first iteration: An Elf sleeping under a large tree, a Dutch windmill scene in the background and tulips, spell books and other miniature delights all around him. (Pictures soon I promise!)
Two: I am creating little 3" x 6" Fortune Tellers like the old arcade versions you'd plunk a quarter into to receive your fortune. This will feature the Upper body arms and hands of the fortune teller herself, tiny cards, crystal ball and more. . . all displayed in a bamboo shadow box display as well.
Three: Reviving my series of Grumpus figurines. There are plant/terrarium dwelling creatures with huge feet and noses (they are in fact, mostly head hands and feet!) and very grumpy looking expressions. I am shrinking them in scale so that they better fit all houseplant environments..So these will be about 3" tall or half the size ofmy older ones.
Four: A new series of pearlescent fairy houses called "The Fairy Houses of Giddings Hill" with half stone facades, dark rooftops and lots of lovely accents. . . .
And last, after actually following though with my blog (for the most part) the month of September I am going to take that exercise of writing a 10 minute blog each day ( I manages 23 posts in September I believe!) and apply it to an idea that I know, if I do not make time for, I will deeply regret and likely never get started on if I wait for the "perfect time" and that is to begin constructing the fantasy book/novella I have been compiling ideas for for the last year. No working title yet but lots of bits and pieces. So, ten minutes a day writing/fleshing out ideas/drawings etc etc. I'll use this blog as a way to stay focused by posting snippets, maps and images and chapters on occasion. ALL feedback will be greatly appreciated. As with anything I have created, it begins with a selfish desire to simply make it happen and bring it into the world. I have no attachment to what happens beyond that. I'll self publish it I am sure, at first, Maybe even self bind a few dozen special editions of it when it is completed. . . .we'll see.
Thank you to all of you who read some of the September posts and those dear friends who commented here and there!
The rest of the year looks busy . . . if not with holiday delights then with new ideas and continued growth in my own form and paracosm of expresion. :)
Have a lovely Autumn (or Spring if you're "down under") weekend!
nicolas
 |
| OK, NEXT year I am going to ROCK these! |
 |
| Just created this pair for a customer! Love the Ghoul Hands! |
 |
| This one began the entire series last year. Back in 2002 I had made many of these, in full size, for a Halloween Yard display which many tiny kids were too scared to walk thru to get their candy! So when they DID brave the walk, they got handsomely rewarded for their efforts in candy! mwahahahahaaha |
I am not sure how I feel about this. . . it is beginning to feel a bit like a lost season in some ways. . . Halloween and Christmas/Winter are my two favorite times of year to create specifically for but I continue to find myself bound by custom work and requests. . . as well as my own ever-expanding range of ideas. Oh it's a sweet dilemma to have . . . that's for sure! :)
Today is the first time in weeks I have the entire day to do as I wish. . . and I am going to focus on new items and not worry so much about the holidays. I have four very specific things I wish to create that I am focused on.
One is a series of 6x6 Fantasy Wall Hangings/Shadow Boxes (ok I know I need to come up with something a little more easy on the tongue there) I have an entire series in mind but am about 40% thru the first iteration: An Elf sleeping under a large tree, a Dutch windmill scene in the background and tulips, spell books and other miniature delights all around him. (Pictures soon I promise!)
Two: I am creating little 3" x 6" Fortune Tellers like the old arcade versions you'd plunk a quarter into to receive your fortune. This will feature the Upper body arms and hands of the fortune teller herself, tiny cards, crystal ball and more. . . all displayed in a bamboo shadow box display as well.
Three: Reviving my series of Grumpus figurines. There are plant/terrarium dwelling creatures with huge feet and noses (they are in fact, mostly head hands and feet!) and very grumpy looking expressions. I am shrinking them in scale so that they better fit all houseplant environments..So these will be about 3" tall or half the size ofmy older ones.
Four: A new series of pearlescent fairy houses called "The Fairy Houses of Giddings Hill" with half stone facades, dark rooftops and lots of lovely accents. . . .
And last, after actually following though with my blog (for the most part) the month of September I am going to take that exercise of writing a 10 minute blog each day ( I manages 23 posts in September I believe!) and apply it to an idea that I know, if I do not make time for, I will deeply regret and likely never get started on if I wait for the "perfect time" and that is to begin constructing the fantasy book/novella I have been compiling ideas for for the last year. No working title yet but lots of bits and pieces. So, ten minutes a day writing/fleshing out ideas/drawings etc etc. I'll use this blog as a way to stay focused by posting snippets, maps and images and chapters on occasion. ALL feedback will be greatly appreciated. As with anything I have created, it begins with a selfish desire to simply make it happen and bring it into the world. I have no attachment to what happens beyond that. I'll self publish it I am sure, at first, Maybe even self bind a few dozen special editions of it when it is completed. . . .we'll see.
Thank you to all of you who read some of the September posts and those dear friends who commented here and there!
The rest of the year looks busy . . . if not with holiday delights then with new ideas and continued growth in my own form and paracosm of expresion. :)
Have a lovely Autumn (or Spring if you're "down under") weekend!
nicolas
Tuesday, April 29, 2014
Something New
It's funny how plans go awry all the time.
I've never been one to try to force anything in my creative business path. I'd rather let things grow organically and not force anything. As long as I am working, improving my craft and trying new ideas, I am quite content to not try and control where things go day to day.
When I began my Shadow of the Sphinx shop on Etsy, I was sure that within a year or two I would branch out and cover other ancient civilizations and make statues and amulets inspired by many civilizations the world over. Well, four years later, the short of the story is I just got so caught up in my own deepening and delving into my subject matter of the Ancient Egyptian pantheon and the art that honored it that I sort of lost track of that goal for awhile. I have beencontent to work on learning those sculpting skills to better the work and not so much onletting myself get carried away with all sorts of side-treks into history.
Recently though I have taken a few requests for pieces that fell outside of that pantheon and I am loving the experience. Mostly it's the fact that I get to learn/read about and explore other cultures and ancient traditions and bring some of those symbols and deities to life.
This week I finished this guy. called Ikenga (in his warrior form)
(from wikipedia)
Ikenga (Igbo literal meaning "place of strength") is a horned Alusi (deity) found among the Igbo people in southeastern Nigeria . It is one of the most popular symbols of the Igbo people, and the most common cultural artifact. Ikenga is mostly maintained, kept or owned by men and occasionally by women of high reputation and integrity in the society. It comprises someone's Chi (personal god), his Ndichie (ancestors), aka Ikenga (right hand), ike (power) as well as spiritual activation through prayer and sacrifice.
And here is the finished piece:
The finish is a micaceous Iron Oxide over black acrylic which adds a textural feel and a light catching surface that I love.
On the heels of this piece are requests for a statue of Freya, one of Odin, a Loki, a set of Terracotta warriors, a statue of Angrbodaan, an Uzume and a totally fictional piece for a novel/book cover that will be a cross between a Jizo and an Aztec inspired votive. . . so I suppose I am being told the time to expand and explore is now? lol
Of course. my main focus remains, in this shop, the Egypian pantheon and it's vast variety of deity depictions. . . . but I love these little side steps into any aspect of ancient history and the chance to do something new. :)
And while it is still secondary to my desire to create fairies, elves, tin houses and reflections of that magical world within, this work remains dear to my heart and, in it's own way, a vital part of that childhood paracosm I sink into every day.
Have a beautiful Mayday all!
nicolas
I've never been one to try to force anything in my creative business path. I'd rather let things grow organically and not force anything. As long as I am working, improving my craft and trying new ideas, I am quite content to not try and control where things go day to day.
When I began my Shadow of the Sphinx shop on Etsy, I was sure that within a year or two I would branch out and cover other ancient civilizations and make statues and amulets inspired by many civilizations the world over. Well, four years later, the short of the story is I just got so caught up in my own deepening and delving into my subject matter of the Ancient Egyptian pantheon and the art that honored it that I sort of lost track of that goal for awhile. I have beencontent to work on learning those sculpting skills to better the work and not so much onletting myself get carried away with all sorts of side-treks into history.
Recently though I have taken a few requests for pieces that fell outside of that pantheon and I am loving the experience. Mostly it's the fact that I get to learn/read about and explore other cultures and ancient traditions and bring some of those symbols and deities to life.
This week I finished this guy. called Ikenga (in his warrior form)
(from wikipedia)
Ikenga (Igbo literal meaning "place of strength") is a horned Alusi (deity) found among the Igbo people in southeastern Nigeria . It is one of the most popular symbols of the Igbo people, and the most common cultural artifact. Ikenga is mostly maintained, kept or owned by men and occasionally by women of high reputation and integrity in the society. It comprises someone's Chi (personal god), his Ndichie (ancestors), aka Ikenga (right hand), ike (power) as well as spiritual activation through prayer and sacrifice.
And here is the finished piece:
On the heels of this piece are requests for a statue of Freya, one of Odin, a Loki, a set of Terracotta warriors, a statue of Angrbodaan, an Uzume and a totally fictional piece for a novel/book cover that will be a cross between a Jizo and an Aztec inspired votive. . . so I suppose I am being told the time to expand and explore is now? lol
Of course. my main focus remains, in this shop, the Egypian pantheon and it's vast variety of deity depictions. . . . but I love these little side steps into any aspect of ancient history and the chance to do something new. :)
And while it is still secondary to my desire to create fairies, elves, tin houses and reflections of that magical world within, this work remains dear to my heart and, in it's own way, a vital part of that childhood paracosm I sink into every day.
Have a beautiful Mayday all!
nicolas
Wednesday, March 26, 2014
Taweret and the Lure of Egyptian Art in My World
One of the reasons I love revisiting the origins of creative aspects in my life is that, over time, they can take on different forms and meanings. They reveal themselves slowly across the years, even disappearing on occasion only to comeback strong somewhere down the line.
They are always evolving and unwinding.
They are the threads.
At the same time, I do not want to lose my grasp on where they began as I truly feel those beginnings are always important and never pass into a state of irrelevance.
While it is always easy to say that Ancient Egyptian art has been something I have been deeply drawn to since I was 6 or 7, it is also true that, over time, the meaning of that has grown with me.
The pieces I have been creating these last four years have been allowing me to explore new avenues for their reasons of existence in my life. Always allowing me to deepen that connection and revisit those wonderful days of ancient history/discovery from my youth.
So, when I create a piece like the Taweret statue below, I am reminded that this link is now close to forty years old. From the first time I saw Her portrayed on tomb carvings and artifacts I was smitten. Some of it was the way my young imagination tried to grasp that this animal, the hippopotamus, was truly a part of Egyptian life. . . not something just seen in a magazine or in an urban zoo. I'd think to my young self, "Yes, I'd have made a statue honoring them too!!"
Sheis magnificent and what I love most is the way ancient artists captured her shape, her toothy grin and her delicate legs.
Now, when I create a piece like this of Taweret, I am always aware of the connection to those early days when I felt that my drawings of Egyptian deities were protecting me somehow. So much so that I drew them on the tops of my feet whenever I felt the need for extra "help". Anubis, Bast, Horus, Sekhmet and Djehuty were all a part of my childhood circle of guardians. . . . but seriously, if you have to pick an animal to "protect" you. . . isn't the hippo going to be at the top of the list due to sheer size alone?? : )
I feel so completely honored that, in recreating these pieces today, I am able to send them off all over the world for others to honor in their own way and for their own personal reasons. It feels as a service is truly being done in their creation and that each one is part of the growing understanding I have of their place in my life today.
What never changes is, at my core, they are all protectors of my dreams, my creative path and my life. It's why they always have a place on my work table and by my bedside. The magic I found in them all those years ago is just as strong today. Except now I make them out of clay and not tin foil and paper as I did as a young boy. lol
Hope you enjoy seeing Her. :)
xo
nicolas
They are always evolving and unwinding.
They are the threads.
At the same time, I do not want to lose my grasp on where they began as I truly feel those beginnings are always important and never pass into a state of irrelevance.
While it is always easy to say that Ancient Egyptian art has been something I have been deeply drawn to since I was 6 or 7, it is also true that, over time, the meaning of that has grown with me.
The pieces I have been creating these last four years have been allowing me to explore new avenues for their reasons of existence in my life. Always allowing me to deepen that connection and revisit those wonderful days of ancient history/discovery from my youth.
So, when I create a piece like the Taweret statue below, I am reminded that this link is now close to forty years old. From the first time I saw Her portrayed on tomb carvings and artifacts I was smitten. Some of it was the way my young imagination tried to grasp that this animal, the hippopotamus, was truly a part of Egyptian life. . . not something just seen in a magazine or in an urban zoo. I'd think to my young self, "Yes, I'd have made a statue honoring them too!!"
Sheis magnificent and what I love most is the way ancient artists captured her shape, her toothy grin and her delicate legs.
 | ||
| Taweret: Patron of Childbirth and Protector of Women and Children |
Now, when I create a piece like this of Taweret, I am always aware of the connection to those early days when I felt that my drawings of Egyptian deities were protecting me somehow. So much so that I drew them on the tops of my feet whenever I felt the need for extra "help". Anubis, Bast, Horus, Sekhmet and Djehuty were all a part of my childhood circle of guardians. . . . but seriously, if you have to pick an animal to "protect" you. . . isn't the hippo going to be at the top of the list due to sheer size alone?? : )
I feel so completely honored that, in recreating these pieces today, I am able to send them off all over the world for others to honor in their own way and for their own personal reasons. It feels as a service is truly being done in their creation and that each one is part of the growing understanding I have of their place in my life today.
What never changes is, at my core, they are all protectors of my dreams, my creative path and my life. It's why they always have a place on my work table and by my bedside. The magic I found in them all those years ago is just as strong today. Except now I make them out of clay and not tin foil and paper as I did as a young boy. lol
Hope you enjoy seeing Her. :)
xo
nicolas
Tuesday, March 18, 2014
The Long and Short Of It All - Edition #1
One of the things about my way of creating that gets wonky sometimes is:
I have a longstanding habit, when choosing the "What next?" from my list of ideas, to go with the smaller, most immediately rewarding ideas. Often this is at the expense of moving forward the larger, more complex ideas that I really want to bring to a completion but that I can't seem to keep moving forward on as time allows. Instead, always seeming to choose the quick idea, or a multitude of them as it often goes, to "finish something".
Nowhere is this more relevant that my 2014 To-Do list and I am resolved to do something about it!
So first, why is that an issue? I make oodles of fun creations that actually move through my shops very well. They make me infinitely happy to create them and I always find time to write a bit of a story to go along with almost each one. . . couple that with an ever growing list of requests and custom pieces and the time left to work on the larger stories and idea is already at a minimum.
But those ideas haunt me as they are always the thing I most want to do every day.
Internally those larger. story based projects are the direct reflection of everything I loved about my childhood and want to re-embrace into the fold of mid adulthood and beyond. They are the lifeline from that era, the link in time to all I am and all I do.
They are my "Tardis" through time and space that take me back to the most wonderful and, yes, sometimes less wonderful of those years too.
And ohhhhh I am a time traveler above all else. . .
I am hoping, that by sharing the ideas here in a series of posts of their progress and intent, the visual reminder of them each time I come to my blog will remind me that they are waiting for me to grow them into full reality.And with each large project I will also post a small, quick idea that came to fruition too. :)
So then
The LONG of It:
The Noble Ice Elves of Spangladasha:
Started this massive idea at the beginning of the year and it is only in the last 4 weeks that it sort of fell off the radar a bit. The little guy below, Fenewen, was the first to appear here. He toldme his story and I was beyond hooked. . . T
he idea is to create a total of 50 Noble Ice Elves ( not all at once mind you) and send each one, as it is adopted, off into the world with an atlas/maps of their land, Spangladasha, and scrolls that tell the story of the elves journey to our world and their purpose here and beyond.
The very-large of the idea is to send quarterly updates to each person as the elves are adopted letting them know the general location of other elves across the globe (by city/country only) and continuing the story through mailings of scrolls, symbols, etc etc as well as updating the Etsy listing with the story as it progresses as new elves appear. So even I will not know exactly where it is going until it gets there.
I LOVE his furry compact body, the crown of polymer clay bones and his "petrified" driftwood power source with it's "ice crystal" attached!! And the ever growing map of the land he and his kind hail from:
Soooo much more to do obviously. Scrolls, books, wax seals, printing the maps, special packaging etc etc. The Noble Ice Elf story is about 5 pages now. That's about as long as I want it so I'll have a years worth of updates already in the bag. I just need to rewrite, edit and re-edit.
Hoping to have 6 or so of these guys ready for Fall release!
And that, my dear friends, is just ONE of the large ideas brewing in this brain lately. :)
The SHORT of it:
The Shen Amulet
So, the Egyptian pieces in Shadow of the Sphinx are a direct link to my early creative worlds I imagined myself often in that time, often as a simple scribe or lay-person working for a Pharaoh. It was a far broader role to me than to rule all of Egypt. lol
The endless list of ancient pieces I have to inspire me has allowed me to continually experience a new thrill when working on these amulets and statues. And often, the ideas allow me to create quickly as with the Shen amulet below. There must be hundreds of iterations of this one amulet/symbol alone. So the inspirational source is endless.
Trouble is I often get caught up in the fun of making smaller things and just let the larger ideas sit a bit too long. . . but then again, Fenewen is always on my work table and he won't be patient for long I suspect. . .
Wishing you all a creative and magical day!
Soon again. . .
nicolas
I have a longstanding habit, when choosing the "What next?" from my list of ideas, to go with the smaller, most immediately rewarding ideas. Often this is at the expense of moving forward the larger, more complex ideas that I really want to bring to a completion but that I can't seem to keep moving forward on as time allows. Instead, always seeming to choose the quick idea, or a multitude of them as it often goes, to "finish something".
Nowhere is this more relevant that my 2014 To-Do list and I am resolved to do something about it!
So first, why is that an issue? I make oodles of fun creations that actually move through my shops very well. They make me infinitely happy to create them and I always find time to write a bit of a story to go along with almost each one. . . couple that with an ever growing list of requests and custom pieces and the time left to work on the larger stories and idea is already at a minimum.
But those ideas haunt me as they are always the thing I most want to do every day.
Internally those larger. story based projects are the direct reflection of everything I loved about my childhood and want to re-embrace into the fold of mid adulthood and beyond. They are the lifeline from that era, the link in time to all I am and all I do.
They are my "Tardis" through time and space that take me back to the most wonderful and, yes, sometimes less wonderful of those years too.
And ohhhhh I am a time traveler above all else. . .
I am hoping, that by sharing the ideas here in a series of posts of their progress and intent, the visual reminder of them each time I come to my blog will remind me that they are waiting for me to grow them into full reality.And with each large project I will also post a small, quick idea that came to fruition too. :)
So then
The LONG of It:
The Noble Ice Elves of Spangladasha:
Started this massive idea at the beginning of the year and it is only in the last 4 weeks that it sort of fell off the radar a bit. The little guy below, Fenewen, was the first to appear here. He toldme his story and I was beyond hooked. . . T
he idea is to create a total of 50 Noble Ice Elves ( not all at once mind you) and send each one, as it is adopted, off into the world with an atlas/maps of their land, Spangladasha, and scrolls that tell the story of the elves journey to our world and their purpose here and beyond.
The very-large of the idea is to send quarterly updates to each person as the elves are adopted letting them know the general location of other elves across the globe (by city/country only) and continuing the story through mailings of scrolls, symbols, etc etc as well as updating the Etsy listing with the story as it progresses as new elves appear. So even I will not know exactly where it is going until it gets there.
 |
| Fenewen |
 |
| Spangladasha - Realm of the Noble Ice Elves |
Soooo much more to do obviously. Scrolls, books, wax seals, printing the maps, special packaging etc etc. The Noble Ice Elf story is about 5 pages now. That's about as long as I want it so I'll have a years worth of updates already in the bag. I just need to rewrite, edit and re-edit.
Hoping to have 6 or so of these guys ready for Fall release!
And that, my dear friends, is just ONE of the large ideas brewing in this brain lately. :)
The SHORT of it:
The Shen Amulet
So, the Egyptian pieces in Shadow of the Sphinx are a direct link to my early creative worlds I imagined myself often in that time, often as a simple scribe or lay-person working for a Pharaoh. It was a far broader role to me than to rule all of Egypt. lol
The endless list of ancient pieces I have to inspire me has allowed me to continually experience a new thrill when working on these amulets and statues. And often, the ideas allow me to create quickly as with the Shen amulet below. There must be hundreds of iterations of this one amulet/symbol alone. So the inspirational source is endless.
 |
| Shen Symbol - Polymer Clay Amulet with Bronze Patina Finish |
Trouble is I often get caught up in the fun of making smaller things and just let the larger ideas sit a bit too long. . . but then again, Fenewen is always on my work table and he won't be patient for long I suspect. . .
Wishing you all a creative and magical day!
Soon again. . .
nicolas
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